National Healthcare Decisions Day
- Martha Calihan MD
- Apr 15
- 2 min read
“I’ll take a good funeral any day over a wedding.”
These were the words spoken by a friend in Ireland recently, talking about a neighbor who had just died and whose funeral was the next day.
In Ireland, it seems, death is a much more accepted part of life than it is here in our culture. People don’t seem afraid of discussing death; it’s a natural part of the life cycle and people find it quite natural to talk about it.
But that’s not the way our culture approaches death. It's most often a topic to be avoided, shrouded in fear and uncertainty. We aren’t comfortable with the process; and we aren’t comfortable talking about it.
Which makes approaching the end of life, our own or that of one we love, so much more difficult than it needs to be.
Being able to talk about death opens the door to talk about our wishes for our own end of life. How we would like it to be, if possible, and being clear about what we do and don’t want. What is important to us; who we chose to be our decision maker if we can no longer communicate. Sure, it can be hard to have these conversations, but starting the conversation opens the space and makes it less hard to go back and revisit it again. And again. Because over time, things may change, circumstances can change, what and how we think about our death may change. So the conversation may need to be had several times.
Today, April 16, it is National Healthcare Decisions Day. As stated by The Conversation Project this day “offers an opportunity to engage in meaningful dialogue about your values and healthcare priorities and connect with those who matter most”. Their website offers a number of excellent resources to help facilitate your conversation, and guides to help think through some of the big decisions.
I strongly urge you to take advantage of this day and these resources and begin to have these conversations.
After all, your death is one of the most important days in your life.
And if you haven't yet read my book on the topic, you can find a copy here: A Death Lived
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